Today I got locked out of my Instagram account - my business one - for about an hour. I was in the middle of sharing about a live training I was doing later today in my Facebook group when it just quit, logged me out and wouldn't let me back in. I tried everything. I started to sweat. I lost my temper with my children.
I got back in right at noon and the live training went well and everything's back to normal.
I can't help but think about a list I made last night.
I was having a hard time at dinner and excused myself early to take a bath and journal. What came out was what I wanted my life to look like. What I wanted to do, how I wanted to feel. It was simple and beautiful. It didn't include being on the phone for hours each day, planning social media campaigns, wearing myself thin and losing my temper with my children when Instagram crashes.
I have always felt a strong dichotomy between life as a mother and the desire to be successful in business. Having never worked for anyone else or been able to support my family financially has been a great source of stress and anxiety for me. Why?
Why isn't being a mother enough? Or is it? Is it enough and I just am bombarded daily with other mothers doing more and think 'hey, I can do that!'. Whatever it is, I want it to stop.
I love building community and supporting women. I love helping mamas get pregnant, enjoy a healthy pregnancy and support them postpartum. I love the community that has come from this blog and that's blossoming within my Facebook group. Why do I always try for more?
There's been a lot of murmurings lately about social media and influencers and while I fall very low on that food chain I do fall prey to overconsumption and feeling the effects of anxiety while scrolling. That's where my need for 'more' stems from. I want to support my family, I want to take them on vacations and everything we've always dreamed of for our children. I also want the quiet quaint life I dreamed up last night while soaking in a bubble bath.
What does this mean for Root Well and my business and my life? Well it means taking a tiny step in a different direction. I love what I'm working on now with The Grove - a group coaching program for pregnant mamas - and I have been talking to more and more women who are craving the same thing for other stages of their lives - pre-conception and postpartum - so those are coming soon. Evergreen programs that are open all the time, ready and waiting for when you reach that stage. It also means instead of being on the phone with 1:1 clients constantly, I'm popping in to group coaching sessions once a week and loving and supporting through emails and our Facebook group. On my time. In my groove.
It also means this space will be brought back to life a little. More personal stories, photos, homeschool resources, and ramblings like this. Just for fun. Just for me. And you.